May Tool Newsletter

Blair has released the May 2011 Tool Newsletter on Toolband this morning in which he discusses the Rapture, and then makes a prediction of his own regarding the release of the next Tool album…

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TAoutsider
TAoutsider
10 years ago

i cannot belive blair would lower his standards to actually eat at taco bell. LOL.
blah blah blah more ramblings.

unclejackson
unclejackson
10 years ago

May 2012? seems plausible.

Both of the dates he mentioned, 5/15 and 5/22 are on a Tuesday, the standard day new albums are released…

Calfium Jay
Calfium Jay
10 years ago

I just wasted 10 minutes of my life reading that.

Oh well, back to my frappucino…

Naattik
10 years ago

That last paragraph of Blair’s May newsletter contains a bunch of text in ALL CAPS (no relation to Pete). If you take the first letter of each ALL CAPS phrase and decode it with your TA decoder ring, carrying the one, you’ll be presented with the startling message: “Lo, a Basil Riot” I don’t need to tell most of you the significance of this phrase, I’m sure.
But here’s where it gets REALLY interesting.
This is just a thinly veiled disguise for the true message, and one that should come as no surprise to anyone paying attention:

Lizbet
Lizbet
10 years ago

Very clever. All though I did think that was one of the more sensible newsletters he has written.

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10 years ago

When I unscramble it I get “last rail, I boo”. “Cause he must be snorting a bunch of rails to be writing that jibber jabber.

emsazo
10 years ago

I hope if it released next May, it ends up on the 7th. That’s my birthday 😀

emsazo
10 years ago

kittaan – 28 minutes ago  »  That last paragraph of Blair’s May newsletter contains a bunch of text in ALL CAPS (no relation to Pete). If you take the first letter of each ALL CAPS phrase and decode it with your TA decoder ring, carrying the one, you’ll be presented with the startling message: “Lo, a Basil Riot” I don’t need to tell most of you the significance of this phrase, I’m sure. But here’s where it gets REALLY interesting. This is just a thinly veiled disguise for the true message, and one that should come as no surprise to… Read more »

budsyralli
budsyralli
Member
10 years ago

man that was a tough read

ilikecheese
ilikecheese
Member
10 years ago

admin – 3 hours ago  » 

Blair has released the May 2011 Tool Newsletter on Toolband this morning in which he discusses the Rapture, and then makes a prediction of his own regarding the release of the next Tool album…

May Tool Newsletter

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seanhalas
seanhalas
10 years ago

oh great. only one more year!

FUCK!

Sprout
Sprout
10 years ago

I have quite literally gone grey waiting for this album lol.

Lizbet
Lizbet
10 years ago

Sprout – 9 minutes ago  » 
I have quite literally gone grey waiting for this album lol.

Haha conceivably there will be some who will die waiting.

badkittygothgirl
10 years ago

seanhalas – 1 hour ago  » 
oh great. only one more year!

FUCK!

My thoughts exactly! Ugh! I was hoping for November/December, but another year?!?! Of course, I’ll be right here giving blood, keeping faith…and I’ll be right here.

in_the_blender
in_the_blender
10 years ago

Why did i sign up to BA? (Blair Army)

All he really does these days is try to sell us shit we obviously dont want. No thanks I dont really give a shit about Darklore when i can read blogs on TDG, nor a book about your collection of Crowley artifacts and texts, when I can actually read my own.

I dont remember as much advertising on TA when it was working, and now that no-one really goes there he’s filling it with self promotion.

4thEye FTW!

ilikecheese
ilikecheese
Member
10 years ago

i would rather own a discover card than read anything written by blair
indeed i would rather be caught riding in a kia before reading anything by blair

cireric
cireric
10 years ago

Why do people hate Blair so much? There’s nothing forcing you to read his newsletters or his posts about Rennes or Darklore or his poetry.
You can read everything relating to Tool here, like tour dates or album release dates.
It strikes me as ridiculous that those of you who hate Blair force yourselves to sit and read what the man writes, just so you can then bitch about it. Or at least, that’s the way it seems. Why else would you read those newsletters?

buk
buk
10 years ago

hi blair

ilikecheese
ilikecheese
Member
10 years ago

admin – 3 hours ago  » 

i would rather own a discover card than read anything written by blair
indeed i would rather be caught riding in a kia before reading anything by blair

how is your Kia going by the way?

not bad i just had now wait just a minute!

264zn
264zn
10 years ago

So are we taking this date seriously then? Also, as I’m not in the know with regards to code breaking, what did the last couple of lines refer to? If that is the date, it better mean a UK summer tour 2012…

ilikecheese
ilikecheese
Member
10 years ago

i dont hate blair anymore than i hate any american idol contestant ive never met
im pretty sure that like the newsletters i dont read i am not going to enjoy the show or the music so i just plain dont watch

264zn
264zn
10 years ago

admin – 59 minutes ago  » 

So are we taking this date seriously then?

I’m not taking the date seriously at all, as I suspect it was a joke related to the alleged Rapture.
That said May is probably a realistic time to expect the record.

I figured as much (after his opening rant). But the May date probably makes sense with the way things are progressing. Still hoping that we might get a listen this year though, dreams are free…

Oh and I think the tool newsletters are great, always good for a laugh.

in_the_blender
in_the_blender
10 years ago

We can get the newsletter for nix on Toolband… TA has nothing to offer any more. I like Blair’s newsletters, just not the sales pitch that accompanies them. His books should be in the Merch section and left to that.

Hellboy hasn’t tried to push his erotic self portraiture upon us has he? Its in the 4thEye Merch section, where it should be.

😛

eyeproductions
10 years ago

Both Tool and Blair have become irrelevant. The time between albums is a joke. The rambling, ridiculous nature of Blair’s newsletters is just an effort to keep you from realising this.

Look at how prolific Omar Rodriguez Lopez is with his own work and The Mars Volta. They have released several top notch albums in the time since Tools last effort. Genuine works of technical brilliance and spiritual depth. It makes Tool’s half decade albums look rather poor.

Maybe I’m for real, maybe I’m just frustrated at waiting. I don’t really know anymore…

Naattik
10 years ago

@ cireric – I don’t hate Blair. And as frustrating as the newsletters can be, I find them entertaining. Regarding my little mini-rant, I found the Anagram animation thing and couldn’t help myself. 8`) @ Hellboy – Agreed, and that would put it at very close to 6 years after the 10K Days release date of April 28th – May 2, 2006 (depending upon where you lived) They’ve already exceeded the 5 years between releases we’ve come to expect… @ 264zn – That would be killer, and a huge shocker for TººL to keep it under wraps and just deliver… Read more »

budsyralli
budsyralli
Member
10 years ago

i wonder what kinda of drugs they took

Jethro Tool
Jethro Tool
10 years ago

date makes sense. 10000 days vinyl and Salival 2 to come this year…

Merkaba
Merkaba
10 years ago

Jethro Tool – 1 hour ago  » 
date makes sense. 10000 days vinyl and Salival 2 to come this year…

I could go for a salival 2! I don’t think it’d be as good as the first though sadly..

ilikecheese
ilikecheese
Member
10 years ago

budsyralli – 6 hours ago  » 
i wonder what kinda of drugs they took

im pretty sure there will be wine involved before the end result with at least some second-hand fumes from the dry erase markers
after a few more libations that will read i like sheese

Lizbet
Lizbet
10 years ago

Hey eyeproductions see you’re doing some work for Jericco. Now there’s a hard working band. Fantastic live and a very nice bunch of guys.

lachrymologist
lachrymologist
Member
10 years ago

admin – 11 minutes ago  » 
<blockquote cite=”http://www.fourtheye.net/2011/05/may-tool-newsletter/#comment-45225″>
i wonder what kinda of drugs they took

Considering Danny just hit 50 probably Viagra and some Alzheimers medication.
Bwahahaha now that’s funny. I needed that hb

Calfium Jay
Calfium Jay
10 years ago

eyeproductions – 3 hours ago  »  Both Tool and Blair have become irrelevant. The time between albums is a joke. The rambling, ridiculous nature of Blair’s newsletters is just an effort to keep you from realising this. If they go into the studio around September (which I’m assuming they will) it will have been 20 months spent writing 9 or 10 songs. Pretty ridiculous effort. They can dress it up anyway they like it, but 20 months for a bunch of talented individuals to write less than a dozen songs is kind of absurd. OK, so they toured and so… Read more »

nicholas
nicholas
10 years ago

the longer it takes the better it will be. duh. they want you to live your life too.

Naattik
10 years ago

@ eyeproductions & Calfium Jay ^ I don’t want to get all fan-boy-like defending TººL here, but the last couple examples, TMV and The Smiths (!)? IMO, those bands do not approach being on an equivalent level. Granted, even though I dig their studio stuff, and I’ve yet to see TMV live (soon though) no matter how you look at it, they don’t approach the brilliance of TººL. And while I do appreciate The Smiths, it’s just out of left field comparing them to TººL, isn’t it? I know you were referring to how prolific they were in a short… Read more »

Lizbet
Lizbet
10 years ago
smithersSOCAL
smithersSOCAL
10 years ago

[quote comment=””]”Also, Octahedron sucked” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a5u8KggfGAY&feature=related [/quote] [quote comment=”45222″]Both Tool and Blair have become irrelevant. The time between albums is a joke. The rambling, ridiculous nature of Blair’s newsletters is just an effort to keep you from realising this. Look at how prolific Omar Rodriguez Lopez is with his own work and The Mars Volta. They have released several top notch albums in the time since Tools last effort. Genuine works of technical brilliance and spiritual depth. It makes Tool’s half decade albums look rather poor. Maybe I’m for real, maybe I’m just frustrated at waiting. I don’t really know anymore…[/quote]… Read more »

Milhuisen
Milhuisen
10 years ago

Can somebody fill me in on what these TA Decoder Rings are ? I’m a TA member but don’t think I have a TA decoder ring ?!

badkittygothgirl
10 years ago

Milhuisen – 50 minutes ago  » 
Can somebody fill me in on what these TA Decoder Rings are ? I’m a TA member but don’t think I have a TA decoder ring ?!

*pulls up chair and popcorn*

Naattik
10 years ago

^ LOLZ!

Milhuisen
Milhuisen
10 years ago

Oh okay.

So then can you maybe give some pointers then Kittaan ?

badkittygothgirl
10 years ago

The TA decoder ring is a joke mentioned by Blair on many occasions. It has also been used as a hazing of sorts for new TA members. The item you should be after is the exclusive TA beach towels.

Milhuisen
Milhuisen
10 years ago

Cheers Gothgirl..

I saw Emsazo mention that “Bottrill is___” and got excited.

I’d love to see them go back to him.

BellJH
BellJH
Member
10 years ago

Chancellor said fans would have to hold their breath until the end of next year for the follow-up to 2006’s 10,000 Days, but promised: “The wait will be worth it”.
“We’ve all talked about it and we realised if we are going to pull off something that’s going to be worthy and remarkable it’s going to take a little bit longer this time,” he said.
“It’s going to take a little time and a little patience but we’re absolutely determined to come up with something exceptional.”

Intension
Intension
10 years ago

Seems to me everyone over looked the best sentence of the newsletter. “No matter how many new TOOL tunes are currently complete,” that was interesting to me. Suggesting that some new stuff is complete. His made up date i dont take seriously at all. His rant making fun of that false prophet was actually really funny. But not much out of the whole letter.

Sargath
Sargath
10 years ago

BellJH – 22 hours ago  » 
Chancellor said fans would have to hold their breath until the end of next year for the follow-up to 2006’s 10,000 Days, but promised: “The wait will be worth it”.
“We’ve all talked about it and we realised if we are going to pull off something that’s going to be worthy and remarkable it’s going to take a little bit longer this time,” he said.
“It’s going to take a little time and a little patience but we’re absolutely determined to come up with something exceptional.”

Where can I find that interview?