Tool December 2015 Newsletter released

Blair has posted the Tool December 2015 Newsletter today, no doubt filling your hearts with much Xmas cheer, or humbugs depending on your life view. It doesn’t appear to contain much Tool news, but I’ll leave this part with you:

Oh, I almost forgot the encrypted holiday message: aaAaavvllll(rrrrrgeeeeeeeeeennndddoooocctttwiihhh)uussd.dj5yybmb

And don’t think it says: “All evergreen decorations (wreaths included) should be removed by January 5th.”

Speaking of Xmas – don’t forget that our Subscriber Giveaway closes on the date celebrating the birth of Brian. If you want to be in the running for a copy of Money Shot or a Tool shirt, then get onto it!

Brian of Nazareth

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UndKeineEier
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So I did a Google search for aaAaavvllll(rrrrrgeeeeeeeeeennndddoooocctttwiihhh)uussd.dj5yybmb and it returned no documents. So we know the message isn’t a document. It’s all coming together.

NatureNurtureHeavenAndHome
Member
NatureNurtureHeavenAndHome

With Code: uussd.dj5yybmb ??

fulcanelli
Member
fulcanelli

Whatever happened to the Opiate video release? More BS, I guess.

nxrm
Member
nxrm

Any out there know where I might be able to get one of those To’ak candy bars Blair mentioned?

ahlaphus
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ahlaphus

Seems Blair hates xmas more than I do, that newsletter is riddled with sarcasm and downright hate for the silly consumer. Can remember reading the 2000 newsletter when it first came out, the story of the mushrooms and reindeer piss and the reds and whites all relating to the made-up story of Santa probably solidified Blair as a go-to guy for the high strangeness (though I can’t recall as I was in college at the time – Go Jayhawks!!). All disdain aside for BMB’s ‘beating around the bush’ when it comes to Tool’s activities, the guy sure can write. Wonder… Read more »

smithersSOCAL
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smithersSOCAL

I doubt BMB has hate for the “silly consumer”
given who he works for and the utter crap t00l released just in time for the holidays…..

AbigTool2015
Member
AbigTool2015

so, if you compare the “encoded message” to the second paragraphs line characters that are between the double quotation marks, all of the symbols and lettering is the same amount and exact characters except for r,n,t,h,u, and s. There are more characters in the second line in quotations for r,n,u, and s. The second line as well has less amount of characters of t and h. Still on the fence whether or not there is a message of any significance in it or not but the fact that both the “encoded message” and “fake” message use the exact same characters/symbols… Read more »

UndKeineEier
Member

So through some advanced code breaking I found these letters to be of importance.

B S E T D R O V L I K N R U Y

WellDone
Member
WellDone

Look back to the archived Xmas newsletter from 2014.

Blair urges readers to check back from time to time as the newsletter is a “work in progress” and cautions that, “you just might miss something of minor importance.”

He also writes, “I will have to pause at this point to get ready for the holiday lunch. However, before I leave, I thought I should remind you that all decorated evergreens (including wreaths) should be removed by JANUARY 5, 2015 e.v. (Once again, you have been warned!)”

chonus
Member
chonus

January 5th announcement that Tool will play Coachella in April?