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April Tools!

Ah, April Fools! In prior years I’ve been organised enough to do some fooling of my own, but this year instead I will reflect on what is increasingly becoming an irrelevant event. In these days of the internet, it takes a genuinely good post to fool anyone. Indeed many were predicting today would be the day Tool announce a new album.

While April 1 is not over, I personally think it’s unlikely Tool would announce and album, possibly their magnum opus, that they’ve worked on for over a decade in this manner. I don’t think that the myriad of fakes, both good and terrible are fooling anyone. People on the internet are generally to cynical and smart to be tricked this way

Of course, Tool did give us something:

Hopefully they will give us something more in the coming weeks….

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bob
bob
4 years ago

bahaha. anyone weird dude talking about colours start somewhere in there ? hehe.

Frostradamus
Frostradamus
Reply to  bob
4 years ago

As in Jon Hamm in Legion, yes?

bob
bob
4 years ago

i really wish this forum had an edit button. any weird dude* not anyone.

Lateralus987
Lateralus987
4 years ago

The cricket videos they they’re posting on Twitter are hilarious!

lumps
lumps
4 years ago

I died laughing when I saw they posted videos of crickets. If people seriously thought that they would drop or announce the new album today were simply out of their minds. Of course, the ultimate prank would be to release a genuine new album on the day that fakes would be all over the place, but the odds that Tool would do that are astronomically low. Especially when they are signed to a label that would not want that. I think we have around 2 more month until we get a new album. It would be nice though if they… Read more »

faaip de oiad
faaip de oiad
4 years ago

April fools day is a laborious task as a tool fan. Toolband on Reddit is a complete shitshow. Bring on April 3rd.

DRURY
DRURY
4 years ago

It’s hilarious how many kids on reddit and elsewhere think Tool sits around thinking of ways to trick their fans. They actually haven’t tricked us at all in years. We’ve been aware of the painfully slow process of the album the entire way, hearing things like “5 song ideas being worked on” or 90% done, Ect. They haven’t been lying or trying to keep anything secret. We have been updated the whole time. So when you still have “fans” coming up with idiotic April fools day theories, it makes you realize just how out of tough many, many Tool listeners… Read more »

adoxnz
adoxnz
4 years ago

lol what an edgelord Hellboy

adoxnz
adoxnz
Reply to  hellboy1975
4 years ago

almost.

rinkwhopper
rinkwhopper
4 years ago

more like egglord

am I right

bent eye
bent eye
4 years ago

A newsletter would be nice

TOOL_Rules
TOOL_Rules
Reply to  bent eye
4 years ago

Or, as Maynard tweeted, (and I’m sure they will come) “more focused updates as we progress.” The further we get into April with no significant updates, the more June looks most likely for the release date. I’m seeing them twice in May and really hope to hear at least one new song. Gotta forget about the price tag and continue realizing how lucky I am to be able to see TOOL once in my city and another time five hours up the road in the same month, no matter what they play. It’s all good. Maynard’s voice was beyond solid… Read more »

biff22
biff22
4 years ago

I’m pretty sure Eat The Elephant was the April Fools joke. The ultimate set up to make people worry about the Tool record. I don’t know about anyone else… I’ve always been excited for Tool releases, but Eat The Elephant was bad enough to make me nervous. There used to be 4 guys I trusted in this band. Now there’s 3.

faaip de oiad
faaip de oiad
Reply to  biff22
4 years ago

Ditto.

Jethro Tool
Jethro Tool
4 years ago

Tool would be nobody without MJK and ETE was a great record. People get older he isn’t gonna sing about same stuff he used to.

biff22
biff22
4 years ago

I hear you. I just thought Eat The Elephant was about as mailed in as you can get. Keenan sounds great but the songs are pretty weak. I’d call it under written for lack of a better term. I’m just kinda surprised it got by MJKs quality control… I more or less just think Howderdel didn’t have the greatest stuff this time around. Not to mention it’s about the most brick walled thing I’ve ever heard.

Z-Werewolf
Z-Werewolf
Reply to  biff22
4 years ago

The music was pretty cookie cutter on Eat the Elephant and guess what… had nothing to do with TOOL.

When it comes to the music in TOOL, Maynard has no say so until it comes to vocals. I’m sure we’re going to be just fine.

Eat the Elephant is not anywhere near relevant to TOOL.

Maynerd
Maynerd
Reply to  Z-Werewolf
4 years ago

MJK will find a way to make some of the vocals suck.

Z-Werewolf
Z-Werewolf
Reply to  Maynerd
4 years ago

We’ll find out soon.

biff22
biff22
Reply to  hellboy1975
4 years ago

I just think that the melodies are pretty “stock” to quote Lars. Sonically ETE is a letdown as well. Obviously to each his own, though I do personally think ETE is a huge misstep in a midas touched career. The reason I have concern is that from his book I construed that MJK serves as quality control of the projects he works on including (but I can see how it might be to a lesser extent) Tool. I have no reason to doubt the rest of the band, and MJK has more than earned the benefit of doubt, but yea…… Read more »

biff22
biff22
Reply to  hellboy1975
4 years ago

I don’t think of emotive as a true APC release. As an album of mostly covers it’s hit or miss like most of them. There’s a couple things on that record I really like… Levee and Fiddle, namely. I get the gist of your bringing it up though. I still think ETE is a big departure from what that band was best at doing and isn’t as inspired as what came before it.

biff22
biff22
Reply to  hellboy1975
4 years ago

That is the most rational opinion on an album I may have ever heard.

rinkwhopper
rinkwhopper
Reply to  biff22
4 years ago

Puscifer is not the product of anyone with a midas touch.

biff22
biff22
Reply to  rinkwhopper
4 years ago

For what it’s worth I wasn’t into Money Shot. Loved everything else especially Conditions of My Parole.

Z-Werewolf
Z-Werewolf
4 years ago

TOOL updated their logo on their website with “MMIX” i.e. 2019.

Z-Werewolf
Z-Werewolf
Reply to  Z-Werewolf
4 years ago

Correction… this is their Facebook Profile Picture.

arrold_
arrold_
4 years ago

Honestly the one that was linked under “terrible” before was really convincing. Curious you changed it to a rickroll….

nemesis
nemesis
4 years ago

The clue on Toolband has had some new words added to it.

t-h-e-y-i-e–l-d-f-r-o-m-f-i-e-l-d-s-a-p-p-e-a-l-e-d-o-n-c-e

now:

t-h-e-y-i-e–l-d-f-r-o-m-f-i-e-l-d-s-a-p-p-e-a-l-e-d-o-n-c-e-u-n-s-e-a-l-e-d-b-y-

lumps
lumps
Reply to  nemesis
4 years ago

burp.

bloo-mune
bloo-mune
Reply to  nemesis
4 years ago

At first, I thought this might have to do with Keenan being a Vintner and possibly having to choose between touring and wine-making in late 2019.

Then, it occurred to me the legal battles Tool has endured during the making of the upcoming release.

Probably thought about this too hard.

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