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Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 4:28 pm
by Ravenpig
Blair posted the Tool 2013 newsletter, and it contains only a small amount of new Tool news. It does however contain a quiz of sorts. Feel free to post your answers in the comments below!

Beginning tomorrow, members of the band will be taking a weeklong break from their writing sessions so that Justin has a chance to recover from a minor arthroscopic procedure involving his knee. (TRUE OR FALSE?) Okay, now that you are up to date with what Tool is doing so far this summer - other than that the next pitch is going to be one hell of a curve ball (TRUE OR FALSE?), I thought it might be fun if the June newsletter contained of a test of sorts - a challenge for all the Tool aficionados out there to demonstrate their knowledge about the band.


Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 4:30 pm
by Ravenpig
Here are the questions, for those who don't wanna go back and forth.

 

1) Of the dozen or so spoof Tool CDs included in the spurious catalog in the insert contained in the import (i.e. European) version of Aenima, one of them is actually real (meaning that it at least includes jam sessions by the band and various other recorded material). Though having never been released to the general public, about 30 copies were surreptitiously placed in various record stores in European cities (most of them in Poland) by members of the band and their crew during a tour over there. TRUE OR FALSE?

2) Coincidently, the first winner of the golden ticket "Seal of Xatanitos" contained in the 21st anniversary edition of "OPIATE" was a woman named "Goldie." TRUE OR FALSE?

3) Danny used the alias of "Barry McCockener" when registering at hotels during tours, while Justin opted for, "Will McFinngerdo." TRUE OR FALSE?

4) One of the songs planned for the band's next album (when ever that might be) is a sequel to a song on a previous Tool album. (Hint, this song involves the concept of a transhuman.) TRUE OR FALSE?

5) In the Tool song entitled "Mantra", Maynard gently coaxed sounds out of one of his pet cats, which were recorded, and then electronically processed to create an eerie droning effect. TRUE OR FALSE?

6) A song on the next Tool record will be called "Toynbee Tyler." The "y" in the word "Tyler" not being a typo, as the song hints at the guardian of speculative Freemasonry, and the "resurrection of the living" as opposed to the dead, which are mentioned on the original "Toynbee Tiles." TRUE OR FALSE?

7) Regarding Danny's other band, "VOLTO!", the cover art for their debut album, "Incitare" (by psychedelic artist Rick Griffin) was originally intended to be used on an album cover by the band "Steppenwolf." TRUE OR FALSE?

8) The main riff in Tool's ultimate hidden track entitled "PROBLEM 8: THE RIEMANN HYPOTHESIS" was played repeatedly (and rather mischievously) by Adam during the sound checks attended by unsuspecting 'meet and greet' guests during the recent Australian and New Zealand tour. TRUE OR FALSE?

9) One of Danny's favorite singer-songwriters is Joni Mitchell. TRUE OR FALSE?

10) For the "LATERALUS" tour, two band members wanted to have an orchestra perform with them on the songs, "LATERALUS", "DISPOSITION", "REFLECTION", "TRIAD", and "PUSHIT." TRUE OR FALSE?

11) Justin first heard a recording of Jimi Hendrix - now one of his favorite musicians - while in BMB's hotel room at the Hard Rock Casino in Las Vegas, Nevada. TRUE OR FALSE?

12) Maynard once subdued an overly enthusiastic fan on stage by placing the person in a martial arts type chokehold - all the while continuing to sing the song until members of security handled the situation. TRUE OR FALSE?

13) Adam doesn't move around much on stage because he has an artificial hip. TRUE OR FALSE?

14) Danny is currently a member of a modern day "HellFire Club" that at times play midnight rounds of golf with flaming balls and the using of high tech night vision goggles instead of seeing with the older secret magical formula known as 'drops of cat's eyes.' TRUE OR FALSE?

15) Tool both signed with their first manager and inked their first record deal (at different times) while performing at the "Coconut Teaszer" club in Los Angeles. TRUE OR FALSE?

16) Donning a mullet wig and the appropriate attire, Maynard once pretended to be a stage technician frantically trying to fix a problem with some equipment seconds before Tool took the stage. As the band began playing "Hooker With A Penis", Maynard quickly stripped from his convincing disguise while doing the vocals. TRUE OR FALSE?

17) The Knights Templar artifact that Danny had melted down as part of his bronze Paiste/Jeff Ocheltree Custom Craft drum kit was found at Montsegur in the South of France on March 16 in 1998. TRUE OR FALSE?

18) With regards to one of Maynard's other bands, the term "A PERFECT CIRCLE" comes from a book written by John Michell. TRUE OR FALSE?

19) On their next record, the band will include a cover called "From A Dry Camel" by prog-metal pioneers "DUST" from their eponymously titled debut album in 1971. The Tool version will retain the same heavy echo-plex vocals, powerful bass lines, wah-wah pedal guitar lead, and a (very) loud gong intro! TRUE OR FALSE?

20) Upon recently learning that "Chili John's" in Burbank was closed for the summer, Danny had a gallon of chili overnight FED-XED from "Ben's Chili Bowl" in Washington D.C. so that his mates could have it for lunch during the next day's writing session. TRUE OR FALSE?

21) During one of Tool's tours in America, after the performance had ended and the house lights were turned on - they were then turned off again, with the colorful stage lightning turned on. Moments later, after almost - but not all - of the concert goers had left the venue, Danny played "Faaip de Oiad" as a LIVE hidden track that was filmed to be released on a possible future DVD release. TRUE OR FALSE?

22) On the recent Australian tour, Tool lighting director Mark 'Junior' Jacobson wrote with a Sharpie the name of one of the new Tool songs (mentioned already in this test?) on some of the golden (not red) squares of confetti that was shot from canons into the audience. TRUE OR FALSE?

23) Danny chose the original release date of JULY 23 for Volto's "INCITARE" to coincide with the helical rising of the star Sirius (also the beginning of the "Dog Days" of summer). TRUE OR FALSE?

Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 4:38 pm
by hellboy
Blair posted the Tool 2013 newsletter, and it contains only a small amount of new Tool news. It does however contain a quiz of sorts. Feel free to post your answers in the comments below!

Beginning tomorrow, members of the band will be taking a weeklong break from their writing sessions so that Justin has a chance to recover from a minor arthroscopic procedure involving his knee. (TRUE OR FALSE?) Okay, now that you are up to date with what Tool is doing so far this summer - other than that the next pitch is going to be one hell of a curve ball (TRUE OR FALSE?), I thought it might be fun if the June newsletter contained of a test of sorts - a challenge for all the Tool aficionados out there to demonstrate their knowledge about the band.


Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 4:47 pm
by ilikecheese


 

Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 4:49 pm
by Calfium Jay
"The next pitch is going to be one hell of a curveball" ?!?!?

What the hell does that mean??

Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 4:51 pm
by Ravenpig
Just a thought, if even one of those new album tracks questions is true, that means May Jay has been involved for a good while, as a few of us have suspected.

Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 5:12 pm
by UndKeineZwEier

False
False
False
False
False
False
False
False
False
True
False
False
False
False
False
False
False
False
False
Falses
False
FAlse
FAilse
FAldil
Falsde
Fadll
Falses
Falsd
Falsde
falsldjfl
False
False
False
FAldkeald

Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 5:15 pm
by UndKeineZwEier
Ravenpig said
 

5. False. I seem to remember Danny saying it was monks chanting.


Nah, it was Maynard's cat.

 

Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 5:26 pm
by Calfium Jay
Ravenpig said
Just a thought, if even one of those new album tracks questions is true, that means May Jay has been involved for a good while, as a few of us have suspected.


Don't get yr hopes up. He hasn't done shit.

Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 8:01 pm
by budsyralli
here my guess's

1. true

2.false

3.false

4.true

5.true

6.false

7.true

8.true

9.false

10.true

11.true

12.true

13.false

14.true

15.true

16.true

17.true

18.false

19.true

20.true

21.true

22.true

23.true

Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 8:05 pm
by markuspoop
UndKeineEier said

Ravenpig said
 

5. False. I seem to remember Danny saying it was monks chanting.


Nah, it was Maynard's cat.

 


Yeah I thought I remember reading somewhere (maybe in that ultimate Tool issue or something) that it was a cat.  Now, whether or not it's actually true or them dicking around is a whole other topic.

Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 8:08 pm
by doors
When I was in Poland two years ago one of my relos did mention there was word of a jam session CD released by TOOL found in an Empik store in Warsaw. At the time I thought she was full of shit.

Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 8:15 pm
by not tyson
That can't be true, someone would have uploaded it by now.

 

 

Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 8:38 pm
by doors
Tyson said
That can't be true, someone would have uploaded it by now.

 


Most likely some old fart picked it up for the gay art. Never to be seen from again..

 

Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 9:12 pm
by Kittaan
doors said

Tyson said
That can't be true, someone would have uploaded it by now.

 


Most likely some old fart picked it up for the gay art. Never to be seen from again..

 


ESL?

Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 9:26 pm
by aenimal
from the dec 2001 newsletter:

Q: I�ve heard that there are several Tool CDs that were released in Europe, but not in America. Is this true, and if so, how can I order them?
A: It is true. In the insert in the European version of Aenima there is a catalogue which lists these CDs. They include: "Three Fat Brown Fingers", "Nurse Ketimella�s Kit* Chen", "Just Up That Dirt Road (Tool Live at the Acropolis)", "The Bethlehem Abortion Clinic", "Crapsteaks smothered in Dictators" and "The Christmas Album by Tool." Someday I will tell you what makes ONE of these cds so special - something the band members don�t want anyone to know - though it�s there for discerning listeners. Perhaps I�ve said too much already.

Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 9:39 pm
by markuspoop
^ Bethlehem Abortion Clinic is my favorite CD.

Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 9:40 pm
by 264zn
aenimal said
from the dec 2001 newsletter:

Q: I�ve heard that there are several Tool CDs that were released in Europe, but not in America. Is this true, and if so, how can I order them?
A: It is true. In the insert in the European version of Aenima there is a catalogue which lists these CDs. They include: "Three Fat Brown Fingers", "Nurse Ketimella�s Kit* Chen", "Just Up That Dirt Road (Tool Live at the Acropolis)", "The Bethlehem Abortion Clinic", "Crapsteaks smothered in Dictators" and "The Christmas Album by Tool." Someday I will tell you what makes ONE of these cds so special - something the band members don�t want anyone to know - though it�s there for discerning listeners. Perhaps I�ve said too much already.


 

Well there you go! Right; time for our Eastern European friends to start looking through those old tool cd collections!

Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 9:54 pm
by aenimal
it's probably on a cassette...in the mar 2011 newsletter (about 'problem 8') blair says:

 

Now, not only was the song professionally recorded; it was actually ‘issued’ in a manufactured medium (though I’m not going to say whether this was vinyl, a CD, or cassette tape). Because of the ingenious way it was made available to the public, “Problem 8” , in my opinion, constitutes the ultimate hidden track. Only, don’t go looking for it among your collection (most of you, that is!), as there are no more than 30 copies on the planet. As for those who have one, most, I’m sure, aren’t aware of it, even though it might be staring them right in the eye on a near daily basis. The reason they aren’t aware of it, is because they’d never think to play it. Okay, enough said…

 

the part about "they'd never think to play it" makes me think they were most likely tapes that they snuck into record stores

Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 11:23 pm
by doors
IRWF?

Do you speak a language other than English?

Posted: Tue Jul 02, 2013 2:33 am
by Ravenpig
I don't think 30 cds in the world would guarantee someone would upload it....

As much as we (Tool "fans") bitch you gotta admit this a fun newsletter. Informative on the past and hints on the future!

Posted: Tue Jul 02, 2013 3:37 am
by Gwarden
Cool newsletter. I'd wager many more of those would be true than people expect.

 

The only one I know for sure is true is Maynard chokeholding the guy who runs on stage during Pushit, since it was documented on video.

Posted: Tue Jul 02, 2013 3:50 am
by mattw
21 is TRUE.

Faaip de Oiad was performed live at the Lateralus tour show at the Lawlor Event Center, Reno, Nevada, November 23 2002.

Tool recorded the last 6 or so shows from that tour and changed up their setlist a little. For example, they opened one or two shows with Cold & Ugly (Oklahoma City: and I think I remember Blair mentioning the Faaip de Oaid thing was done somewhere else during those shows (Fresno maybe?).

8 could be true. That would be cool.

Posted: Tue Jul 02, 2013 5:34 am
by Bogart
The best newsletter we've had in recent memory

Posted: Tue Jul 02, 2013 8:34 am
by sudnshok
So, we pretty much now know that Problem 8 exists on one of those albums and I'm sure we can eliminate the titles with "Tool" on them (since fans would have discovered those already). Since no one would probably buy any albums with those names, they are probably either still sitting in those record stores or long since thrown away.